Bear chasing you through the woods.

The next five days were brutal.  Brutal is an understatement.  We couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't even make eye contact.  If it weren't for having to feed the kids we wouldn't even think about food.  I lost 8 pounds in 5 days and Dusty had lost 15 pounds.  It was melting off of him.  Dr. Singhal called us in a very low dose of Xanax to help with our nerves.  It helped so much.  Not only were we stressing out every time the phone rang thinking it was bad news from the doctor; we had Masters week in less than one week.  It was hectic and stressful.  Getting through the day was difficult but work helped keep my mind off of things.  Night time was hard. Laying in bed was awkward.  It is hard to understand how laying in bed with the man you have been laying in bed with for eight year was awkward, but it was.  Him holding me was in a different manner of love it was more of a manner of support.  Dusty said he felt like he was being chased in the woods by a bear and there was nothing he could do about it.